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[May. 14th, 2008|10:58 am] |
"Don't walk behind me, I may not lead.
Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow.
Just walk beside me and be my friend."
Camus
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| 34 and 60 are the ones that crack me up. |
[May. 14th, 2008|09:54 am] |
NO LONGER WEIRD
by Chuck Shepherd Copyright 2003. All rights reserved.
Updated: August 1, 2003
The following kinds of stories were formerly weird, but they now occur with
such frequency that they must be retired from circulation:
1. an old, widely-advertised phone-sex number is reassigned to a
church/charity
2. suspicious package thought to be a bomb, turns out to be something stupid
3. robber leaves his ID [wallet or appointment card for probation officer or etc.] at the scene
4. peace/brotherhood conference erupts into violence
5. robber on getaway accidentally hails unmarked police car
6. political candidate dies but still wins the election
7. family thinks he's dead, but he's not and attends his own funeral
8. hunters shoot each other
9. funeral home owner neglects/mixes up bodies
10. "victimized" drug buyer complains to police that someone sold him weak or bogus drugs
11. some countries prohibit giving children certain names
12. in middle of an obvious drug raid, customer wanders up and asks cop if he can buy some drugs
13. shoots himself while supposedly demonstrating gun safety
14. global warming caused by animal methane
15. burglar gets stuck in vent or chimney
16. courthouse visitor/defendant inadvertently places contraband on the
x-ray tables at entrance
17. burglar falls asleep during job.
18. family accidentally leaves behind a kid at a highway rest stop
19. driver's license applicant crashes into examiner station before or during test
20. [Oops! It's about the same as number 15]
21. overdue-library-book scofflaws actually go to jail
22. DUI tickets for "driving" a bicycle [or horse or riding lawn mower or etc.]
23. starts fire because can't stop smoking even though hooked up to oxygen machine
24. gasoline thieves check quantity in tank by using a match or lighter to peer inside
25. older teacher/younger boy relationship
26. firefighter with an arson habit [to keep in practice or to feel wanted or etc.]
27. local election ends in tie, settled (by law) by coin flip or draw of cards
28. Japanese men committing suicide because of overwork
29. angry customer drives car right through store's front door
30. heating-oil delivery to wrong house, resulting in flooded basement
31. postal worker hoards mail because he's behind in delivering it
32. bank robber hails taxi or municipal bus for getaway
33. the annual student cheating riots in Bangladesh
34. criminal on the lam goes on national tv talk show and mentions that he's wanted
35. dog steps on gun, shooting the master
36. pack of animals breaks into liquor cabinet or fermenting vat, get drunk
37. a loved one died at home, but the relative never gets around to burying him or her
38. school zero-tolerance policies for "weapons" that are purely, obviously ornamental
39. amateur videographers set up miniature cameras in restrooms
40. animal-hoarding (mostly of cats) women
41. carjackers who never learned to drive stick shift and must abandon the car
42. criminal suspect evading police, jumps in river to escape, and drowns
43. young-looking adults impersonate teenagers and return to high school
44. African nation's rumors of people with power to make penises disappear
45. humongous abdominal cysts removed in surgery
46. unlabeled urn with loved one's ashes mistakenly stolen or sold at yard sale
47. husband takes his wife back even though she just tried to kill him
48. judges punish young people by forcing them to listen to [classical or polka or etc.] music
49. hit-and-run driver drives on and on with body or bicycle in grille or windshield
50. criminal, cornered by police dog, bites the dog
51. burglars leave footprints in snow, directly to their homes
52. [Oops! It's about the same as number 48]
53. video shoe-cams or smoke-detector-cams to spy on women
54. Japanese making many silent hang-up telephone calls against former lover or business partner
55. robber smashes store's surveillance "camera," but it's only the lens, and it captured his face
56. inadvertently tries to cash a stolen personal check at the store [bank] where his victim works
57. accidental bombing of house by airliner's "blue ice"
58. elderly citizen trying to convince bureaucrat that, contrary to records, he's not really dead
59. elderly motorist makes wrong turn, gets lost for days
60. bands of criminals videotape their entire crime sprees for kicks, but makes it easy for cops
61. parents frolic while their small kids are left home alone
62. people trying to outrun police while driving slow-moving vehicles
63. combining jellyfish gene to produce another plant or animal that glows
64. imposter cop has car with flashing light, stopping motorists, accidentally stops real cop
65. parents who leave their small kids locked in hot cars while they frolic
66. inmates who advertise innocently for penpals on lonely-hearts pages on
the Internet. |
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| A little news of the weird. |
[May. 13th, 2008|09:42 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  quixotic | ] |
From Nickelodeon merchandising has come a Spongebob Squarepants Musical Rectal Thermometer (which plays the Spongebob theme that (the designer apparently imagines) makes the temperature-taking process less unpleasant). [CartoonBrew.com, 2-19-08] |
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| I guess it was a stress test. |
[May. 12th, 2008|04:58 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
I got a bill from the cardiac department of the hospital. it said that I didn't have insurance and that I needed to pay the entire amount. I called my insurance provider today and they said that they were never contacted. I called the billing depart of the hospital and they admitted that they made a mistake. I will be getting a new bill in the mail. Sorry for the mix up.
In similar news I wore my sports heart monitor at work today and it looks like my heart rate is sticking to the more normal range. I had a brief lie down in the sick room to see how low it would go and I made it down to 76, How patriotic.
I like my new ticker, I think I'll keep it.
P.S. After sitting here for a while I managed a 67! Boyah! |
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| better living thru chemicals. |
[May. 12th, 2008|03:55 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | meds | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | alive | ] |
It seemed my beta-blocker was starting to kick in the later half of last week. I was told that one side effect would be fatigue. I had enough sleep but I would wake up feeling like I was up all night. I would get it after lunch as well. I've been napping in the evenings too. Friday evening I crashed around ten, slept all night and still had a nap the next afternoon.
Today I feel more like myself.
I don't know if it's the Zokor or the fat free soynaise but I've been a little gassy too. The kind of gassy I can't blame on the cat. There's been a little weight gain as well.
The Lisinopril has caused a little dehydration but that's easily remedied with copious amounts of water. I have a standing reservation for the men's room. I want to start having meetings in there.
It's the low dose aspirin that doesn't seem to have any side effects. |
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| I would have thought there would be more. |
[May. 12th, 2008|05:47 am] |
| [ | Tags | | | meme | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
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| The Great Big World of WTF?! |
[May. 9th, 2008|08:42 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  angry | ] |
This is the news story about three teenage year old kids who dug up the grave of a 11 year old boy from the twenties, stole his skull, and MADE A BONG OUT OF IT.
WTF |
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| How to Dance in the Rain |
[May. 7th, 2008|10:25 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.
The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's disease.
As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.
He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.
I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?'
He smiled as he patted my hand and said,
'She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is.'
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.
I hope you share this with someone you care about. I just did.
'Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain.' |
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| Thumpie update |
[May. 7th, 2008|09:37 pm] |
I went back to the hospital for a check up on my heart after two weeks on the blood pressure meds. My pressure is still boarder line hypertensive. They want to add a beta blocker on top of my ace inhibitor. This is the blood pressure stuff that is suppose to help my heart heal up after the last event. The beta blocker is suppose to lower my heart rate a little as well. I'll have to where my heart monitor in a couple of days and see what happens.
I have another echo cardiogram scheduled in a couple of months and hopefully I won't have to take the blood pressure any more. It sound like I'm stuck with the Zocor, that's the one for cholesterol.
It sounds like I've been afflicted with the family curse. Both my parents had hypertension. I think a couple of my siblings are dealing with blood pressure issues too.
I don't think this will affect my ability to take the walk. We'll see.
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| Another weekend post. |
[May. 6th, 2008|12:02 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | busy | ] |
Friday evening: ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) cressida42, R, and I went to Q cumbers for a decent all you can eat meal. I managed to stick with relatively healthy stuff. I'm sure I could have toned down the quantities. They make an Italian navy bean soup with kale that I like. We shot the breeze and then went to Cressida's place to watch a couple of shows on her DVR.
Saturday morning: cressida42 and I went out hunting for free comics. It was Free comic book day and she had a mission. After dosing up at Caribou we headed over to Hot Comics and Collectibles on 66th and Nicollet. That was a short stay and then we went up to The source on Larpenteur and Snelling. They had folks and friends dressed up as super heroes. I knew Wonder Woman from the MISFITS. One of the reasons we went to the Source was to try to find a figure for my Halfling. The had a S*&tload of gnomes but not a lot of Halfling figures. I think it's a racial bias. After The Source we went up to Outpost 2000, the comic book and gaming store that Cressida likes. I picked up a baseball hat; the sun was out and my hoodie was getting warm.
The afternoon and evening we spent celebrating sassy_54's birthday. We all met at Zantigos in Bloomington and then headed to Block E to watch IRONMAN. It was the second time for Cressida and I but it was still cool. We ended up the evening at The Shout House in E Block. It's a dueling piano bar that caters to Birthdays and Bachelorette parties. I'm not really a bar kind of guy but it was fun. They had about half a dozen pianists swapping shifts for the entire evening and they mostly play requests from the audience. One person from our group requested IRONMAN, the Black Sabbath tune and the guy up at the time actually pulled it off. I was really impressed. We ended up bailing out around midnight. I didn't have to take Mom to church on Sunday but I wanted to take her out to our usual place for brunch. It was her birthday too.
Sunday: I got to sleep in for a bit. Cressida, Mom, My brother S, and I went to Gigi's on 35th and Bryant. Mom and S had eaten earlier so Cressida and I had something more substantial. I went for the spinach walnut burger. Gigi's veggie burgers are better then mine. My brother S is a pilot and once you get him on the subject he'll go on for ours. Cressida42 indulged him with a few questions and really got him going. Mom seemed to focus on the state of my hair. She commented on the fact that my eyes didn't match like she was noticing it for the first time. She also told me that she gave away her sewing machine to one of the guys who was cleaning her place. It was one that I had for a while and was hoping to hang on to. *sigh*
We dropped Mom off at her place. Cressida drove back to her apartment and I went home and suited up for the walk to her place. I had a nice six mile jaunt with a liter of water and a copy of David Sedaris's book Naked, funny stuff. I could relate to the story about putting his Greek grandmother into a nursing home.
After resting at her place for a little while we got our stuff together for an evening of D&D. Cressida and I missed a game because of Oddcon so we started out suddenly in a dungeon with weird multiarmed orcs and an Orc mage. My halfling got a cone of cold in the face and lost 35 more points then he had. Fortunately our DM believes in divine intervention and I got him back. It would have been really annoying to get a good halfling figure and then the character bites it.
Anyway that was my busy weekend. I have more for this week but I'll post that later. |
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| I little bit o this and a little bit of that. |
[May. 2nd, 2008|11:26 am] |
Iron Man Rocked. The clips on the commercials are a taste of the film not just the best part.
The sushi patches are a little smaller then I was expecting but they still have that great absurdity factor. |
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| Amazing Thailand |
[Apr. 30th, 2008|03:03 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | full | ] |
After the wardrobe was in place cressida42 and I checked out the Amazing Thailand restaurant. It's the new place in uptown that used to be a Panera. It's a reasonably priced very classy place. The food is a little above the usual price but it taste worth it. I had a vegetarian thai dish that was fantastic and they can adjust the level of heat to your taste.
The place is full of Thai art as well. Just in the entrance is a six foot tall Bhuddha and in the main lobby there is half of a small Thai taxi cab.
I strongly recommend it if you like spicey asian food. It was really excellent. |
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| It's been a while since I mentioned it. |
[Apr. 30th, 2008|09:40 am] |
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| What I've been doing for the last three days. |
[Apr. 30th, 2008|07:04 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | pleased | ] |
Friday evening cressida42 were both in a bit of a down mood. So we hung out at her place and worked on her DVR a bit.
Saturday morning we watch an episode of Doctor Who and two episodes of the Adventures of Sarah Jane. That's how everyone should spend Saturday mornings.
We spent Saturday afternoon playing Alternity. My socially backward psychic got to blow up a couple of people with his mind, something I'm certainly pleased with. Bangarang.
After that Cressida sat down to a season of Blackadder the second while I took a nice walk around Lake Calhoun. This is the first walk after my heart procedure and I was a little concerned that I would get winded because one of the meds is supposed to wear me out. I felt great. It was chilly out Saturday but I was dressed for it and the lake was beautiful. If I didn't have other things to do I would have walked around Harriet as well.
Sunday morning I met up with dragonmyst00 at his house in order to get the wardrobe he had in his house that used to belong to my Dad. We got it into his truck and at my place just fine but he and I didn't have the back to get it up the stairs. We ended up shoving it in to the least inconvenient spot in the back hallway with a note saying I'll take care of it really.
Sunday afternoon was my sisters birthday at the Crimson Bottom Feeder. My brother and family were invited but we weren't sure if they would show up or not. They were there when we showed up and my sister got to see her nephew. Everyone was civil and no one stormed out pissed. On the whole a much nicer Sunday then I was expecting.
Monday I got a hold of some movers who would be able to come by and take care of the wardrobe on Tuesday. They seemed a little uncertain of when or how late they could show up so I was a bit on edge all afternoon. I managed to catch the earlier train home. I cleared out some of the things that would have been in the way and then waited. Three guys in a truck with some straps drove up to the back of the building at six. They didn't have a dolly just some straps. Two big guys muscled it into my place and in position in under ten minutes. They charged a little more then what I was expecting but it was worth it.
After wards Cressida42 came over and we tried the new Thai place in Uptown. I'll have to talk about that in a post by itself. |
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| And you don't follow what others do. |
[Apr. 25th, 2008|03:35 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | meme | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
My Personality
| | Neuroticism | | Extraversion | | Openness to Experience | | Agreeableness | | Conscientiousness | |
| You do not experience strong, irresistible cravings and consequently do not find yourself tempted to overindulge, however you experience panic, confusion, and helplessness when under pressure or stress. You tend not to talk much and prefer to let others control the activities of groups. You like the security of tradition, but sometimes have a desire to bend the rules and challenge conventional thinking. You do not like to claim that you are better than other people, and generally shy from talking yourself up, however there are times when you believe that a certain amount of deception in social relationships is necessary, however you are mostly candid, frank and sincere. People find it moderately easy to relate to you. You are a reasonably organized person and like to have a certain amount of routine in your life.
| Take a Personality Test now or view the full Personality Report.
The best Uggs |
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| Come in here young man RIGHT NOW! |
[Apr. 24th, 2008|09:19 am] |
I would go outside and do the storm scene from King Lear but my girlfriend would kick my ass. |
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| Happy Birthday Billy Boy |
[Apr. 23rd, 2008|06:48 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | nostalgic | ] |
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| My first sunday out of the hospital. |
[Apr. 20th, 2008|02:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | very pleased | ] |
Mom had an angina attack yesterday so today she didn't feel like going to church. In fact she's talking about not going to church anymore. Considering Mom's faith I disturbed by the idea. She hasn't gone in a long time for health reasons but she has always talked about going and changed her mind at the last minute.
After she attended the house service, Mom, cressida42, and I had a nice breakfast at Gigi's. It had been a while since I had been there with her so at least some of the Sunday rituals are continuing. I had my first raspberry mocha in a year and a half! We talked about our various health issues and Mom was reassured that "Old Thumpy" is fixed. She and Cressida got to know each other better and when we parted company Mom gave her a peck on the cheek.
I'm pleased. Mom can say rude things sometimes when she's in a little but if a manic phase. She was excited about the Pope being on television and she wanted to take pictures of him.
Mom had mentioned she was taking a new med. When she looked up what it was for she found out she's taking a medication for Alzheimer's. She thinks she might have it now. There aren't a lot of meds for her problem so sometimes you have to try the next best thing. Thankfully she's is pretty resigned to it. If it's what I have to take then it's what I have to take, Oh well.
I'm spending the rest of the afternoon at Cressida's, helping her watch tv. |
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| I can have coffee now! |
[Apr. 20th, 2008|10:17 am] |
I'm going to celebrate with a Raspberry moche this morning with mom. Hopefully this won't happen.
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| I'm getting more use out of that heart patch Birdfigment. |
[Apr. 19th, 2008|04:27 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | better | ] |
First of all I'm okay I'm back home.
I had another arrhythmia episode last Thursday. cressida42 drove me to the emergency room at Fairview Southdale, it was the closest. My heart went back to normal the second I sat down in the waiting room, of course. I went in anyway just to get it checked out. It was decided that I should stay the night. They woke me up for blood work every four hours as if it wasn't hard enough to sleep. The resident cardiologist suggested getting an angiogram to make sure my heart hasn't been damaged. After that was done they did the procedure to correct my SVT, the reason my heart races in the first place. My heart has been fixed.
The second night I got to relax more and I spend a good portion of Saturday being antsy to get out.
It was the first time that I spent the night in a hospital as a formal patient.
They put me on some meds for high blood pressure, one to lower cholesterol, and a low dose of aspirin. Some of this is for what looked like the beginnings of heart disease. It's something that tends to run in the family.
I'm deeply grateful for cressida42's help with everything. We were on the way to see Run Fatboy Run when my heart went off. She took me to the emergency room and insisted on picking me up. If I took the bus home she would have kicked my ass. |
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